I sat here today in my living room...Christmas tree down, decorations down and everything back in place just like it was prior to Christmas. My mind wandered and filled with so many thoughts. I honestly felt so blessed at that moment to just be here. Prior to Christmas I had not been feeling all that great. I made excuses for the discomfort I was experiencing and kept thinking it would get better. Then bang! Loitton and I were shopping in Target and I had a crushing feeling hit me in the chest. I honestly felt like I was going to pass out. It was the pain and feeling similar to what I felt when I broke my foot. So naturally I thought no big deal - it will pass. All throughout that weekend I had discomfort but again I convinced myself it was a pulled muscle or something minor. Monday morning I am at work and that crushing feeling strikes again! I try walking around hoping it would help. I called and went to the doctor. By the time I got to the office, my BP was very high and my EKG was irregular. I was immediately sent to the hospital for further tests. Thank goodness for nitrogylcerin tablets! Never taken one before and hope to never take one again but for that moment I was thanking God for that small tablet. The pain was instantly gone! After lots of tests, it was determined my heart is good and I couldn't be happier. I am on meds for the BP. Swore I would never take meds for that but lesson learned is never say never! Another lesson I am going to have to learn is how to let some things go and not stress! So much easier said than done.
I have certainly had time to reflect on what was a scary time for me. As scared as I was I knew that I know and love my God and trust that when my time comes He will carry me home but I just kept thinking not now! Please not now.
2011 was a challenging year for me. For the first time in the history of our firm, we had to lay employees off. Employess that were friends - tough stuff! In March my boss and friend died. We had enjoyed a working relationship since 1980. I was crushed! I had to overcome and adjust to a "new normal". I gained a new boss (although I had worked with him for just as many years). We had to find a way to press on. Unfortunately in September, due to financial struggles, we closed the firm. I was crushed again! I honestly thought of my job as family and it was like another huge loss in my life. Again, I had to overcome my fears and press on. I am now working for another engineering firm but change is hard at times and it is taking time to adjust. Our family has experienced sadness and hurt in 2011. I am trying to overcome that and praying that other family members are getting stronger and fighting hard on their battles.
We have however experienced some wonderful things in 2011. I gained a daughter in April when Owens, our middle child, got married. She is the love of his life and I couldn't be happier. I also gained a new "niece in love" when my nephew got married. Another niece got engaged as well as a nephew. Our family is growing in leaps and bounds. And to top it off we also have new babies....Reid, Addison, Abigail and Zoe. Whew - I sure hope I am not overlooking anyone or anything. Although all of these are exciting events some brought their own challenges but we overcame!
I think I have always been the type of person that saw a glass half full, not empty! So as I move into 2012 I want my glass to be half full. I don't want to take life for granted. I don't want to allow stress to get the best of me. I don't want to allow circumstances to get the best of me. I do want to continue to focus on God, my family and my friends. After all those are what really count. Happy 2012!
Travis Lee Callahan Jr.
2 years ago